Auditions for the SCT Main Stage

Please pick one monologue. You will be asked to perform it once “normally” as the character. You will then be asked to do it again with a “twist” (i.e. there is an annoying fly buzzing around you, you really have to use the restroom, etc).  We will be looking for your ability to really commit to a given circumstance and having to deal with an outside distraction. The comedy of this show comes from actors trying their hardest to put on a great play but not succeeding because of outside distractions. All the characters in the play-within-a-play have British accents, but the actors playing those characters aren’t necessarily British, so the accents don’t have to be good.

MAX (CECIL)  Well bravo, Inspector! You’ve found out about Florence and I, but it proves nothing. We had nothing to do with Charles’ murder, but Thomas Colleymoore does. Oh Inspector, he’s a dangerously unhinged man, with a devil of a temper and Florence is his sister. Now I’ve said it once before and I shall say it once again: He couldn’t stand the idea of giving her up to any man, let alone his old school chum. He saw them together at tonight’s engagement party and he lost control and he lashed out at Charles. A crime of passion perhaps, but there it is!

ROBERT (THOMAS): Fitzroy! Thank you for calling again … Yes this is a much more convenient time, thank you … Another transaction traced … A one-way ticket to Dover? No I have no idea! Hello? Fitzroy? Are you there? Ah, there you are, Fitzroy. You’ve given nine thousand pounds of my money to someone else. You are causing me more pain than you could possibly imagine! I shall hang up the phone immediately.

CHRIS (INSPECTOR CARTER). You are the murderer, Miss Colleymoore. It is plain for us all to see. You were engaged to be married to Charles, a man who according to your letter you despised. Not only this but you were having an affair with his brother. It seems plausible to me that you both murdered him so you could be together.

JONATHAN (CHARLES). You couldn’t kill me that easily. I simply didn’t drink the poisoned sherry you left out for me this evening. Ever since we last spoke at the police station it was clear you thought I was on to you. It was at this point I became afraid you might try to kill me. For months now I’ve had my guard up and tonight you fell into my trap.

DENNIS (PERKINS). This is all a misunderstanding! I didn’t kill Charles, but I know who did. Inspector Carter! You did it because Charles knew about the police money you were embezzling. You say you’d met before, that he was a consultant on a fraud case you were working on.  Charles found the reason why no arrests had been made is because the man committing the crime was yourself. You were the perpetrator. I know your secret, Inspector. What will you do? Kill me too?

ANNIE/SANDRA (FLORENCE) Charley! No! I can’t believe what I’m seeing. My God, he looks so frail lying there. His skin is cold to the touch. Oh, who could do such a thing? The night of our engagement party. Cecil, quick! Your brother’s dead. My fiance dead, I can’t bear it. This is more than my nerves can take. I simply can’t stand it. Thomas, think I’m becoming hysterical! (FLORENCE becomes hysterical and has a screaming “episode.” Then, after the episode…) Thomas, I feel I shall pass out. This is terrible, just a week after our engagement

TREVOR. Okay, welcome to The Murder at Haversham Manor. Can I kindly request that all you cell phones and other electronic devices are switched off and please note that photography of any kind is strictly prohibited. Also, if anyone finds a Duran Duran CB box set anywhere in the auditorium, that is a personal item and I want that back. Please do drop it at my tech box at the end of the show. Enjoy the performance.